Disclaimer!
This is not a particularly funny post, although I think there is some pretty funny stuff in it. It’s about politics, or at least political issues, so if you’ve had enough of that stuff for a while, do yourself a favor, and skip down to the “Death By Grippo’s” post. Also, there is some stuff in here that some might find offensive (I’m pretty sure the language is okay, but some of the ideas may be a little scary), so be warned. That said, I hope you get a laugh, and more importantly, a think out of it. Enjoy, and, as always, thanks for reading!
American Exceptionalism
American Exceptionalism is one of those terms that gets flung around a lot over the last few years, and with an election coming up, I’m pretty sure that we’re going to be hearing a lot more about it. It’s one of those things that politicians love to talk about in order to show how much they love America (as if the flag pins, flag bunting, images of flags-waving-above-fields-of-grain and fading in and out as backgrounds in campaign ads and Stars-and-Stripes-based logos weren’t enough). They shout about “American Exceptionalism” and “America is the greatest country in the world” and “Americans are the greatest people in the world”. They go on and on about how we do everything better than everybody else in the world. We’re innovators! We’re motivators! We’re tire rotators! (sorry, couldn’t help myself) We’re the Land of the Free, and the Home of the Brave. Yee Haw!
I guess that would be okay, if the people spouting it really seemed to believe it. All too often, however, they then go on to describe how we can’t do things that are already being done all over the world. They go on and on about how those things are going to destroy our country.
Gay Marriage!
Seriously? How can we be so mighty, so awesomely powerful, so incredibly wonderful, and yet letting two people who love each other publicly and legally bind their lives together will bring this great nation to its knees? The weird thing to me is that nobody seemed to care if they cohabitated before this (well, okay, they did, but I don’t recall anybody screaming for laws to prevent it). I also heard a lot of people saying that okay, they should be allowed to have civil unions (the 21st-century equivalent of jumping over a broom), just keep the M-word out of it.
A lot of people are screaming that it is a sign of the moral decay of our nation. But is it? Which is more immoral? To force others to live a life less free than yourself so you can pretend that it doesn’t exist, or to accept that, okay, not everyone believes as I do, but they are no less a person than I? That seems to be what it really comes down to, to me anyway.
I know that a lot of genuinely good people worry about the wrath of God coming down on us as a nation over this, but, as I’ve said before, compared with slavery, Jim Crow, 400+ years of genocide, and polluting the environment so badly that our rivers used to catch on fire, I’m pretty sure that gay marriage is just a fart in the windstorm of American morality. If we’re so exceptional, then shouldn’t equality be a given (since it is one of the founding principles of this country)? I feel fairly confident that the only straight people this whole gay marriage thing is going to significantly effect is straight lawyers who will be making a lot more money, because I’m guessing that gay Americans will prove to be just as inept as straight Americans at picking life-long partners to legally bind themselves to on the first try. On the other hand, maybe they’ll be exceptionally good at it. Wouldn’t that be a kick in the pants?
Keep moving people, nothing to see here.
Socialized Medicine!
If the gay marriage thing doesn’t get us, then socialized medicine will bring the country down for sure. In fact, a lot of people seem to think that Obamacare (which is a long way from real socialized medicine) is the worst thing that has ever happened to this country. It’s going to destroy our economy! Death panels! Blah, Blah, Blah! More Blah, Blah, Blah! We’re all going to die! Well, yeah, I’ll grant you, that last one is true, but it won’t be because of Obamacare. I’ll admit, I’m not a fan of Obamacare. At worst, it’s selling more of the country to insurance companies. At best, I see it as a bad first step in the right direction.But that’s the thing; at least we’re moving in the right direction, which is viewing health-care as a right and a societal responsibility, not a privilege. Just about every other industrialized country on earth seems to see it that way, and it hasn’t destroyed any of them. Granted, it’s far from perfect in most of them, but it works. That’s where the American Exceptionalists should see an opportunity to prove how exceptional we really are. Innovate! Improve! Take what those other countries are doing right, and fix what they’re doing wrong! Now that would be exceptional.
Diplomacy!
As if the gay marriage and the socialized medicine weren’t bad enough, now we’re stooping to diplomacy. We’re doomed! We’re not a diplomacy people, we’re a kill ’em all and let God sort ’em out people. I’m talking, of course, about the Iran deal (dun, dun, dunnnnnn). I’ll grant you, I’m leery of it. I don’t know what’s in it. On the other hand, none of it’s detractors did either before they started trumpeting it as the other other worst thing that’s ever happened in the history of, well, history. What I do know is that England, France, China, and Russia all worked on it too, and none of them (or anyone else in the world) stands to benefit from the religious whackado’s in charge of Iran’s government getting nuclear weapons. I also know that none of our other recent wars in the middle east have exactly worked out the way we were told they would. I feel fairly confident that getting to the point where we can sit across the table from Iran and talk seems infinitely more promising than screaming threats at each other and vowing to destroy each other.
As a veteran, I am confident in the exceptionalism of our armed forces. I also think we’ve asked more than enough of them for the time being. We should use our military as a last resort, because we have to, not because, well, it’s fun to blow stuff up. I feel like maybe it’s time to give our diplomats a shot at being exceptional as well.
Renewable Energy!
If we somehow manage to stave off the complete and utter destruction brought on by gay marriage/socialized medicine/diplomacy, we’ll still be screwed by the push for renewable energy. Now I know that the chances of powering the entire country with wind and/or solar energy or whatever else they’re coming up with (I saw something about electricity-generating algae the other day) is pretty unlikely, even in a best case scenario. But it could help a whole lot of people. Out in S. Dakota, on Pine Ridge Indian Reservation, a place tailor-made for wind and solar power, there are hundreds of people who spend a large part of every year without electricity, because they can’t pay the bills (I’ve seen statistics that show median household income on Pine Ridge Reservation anywhere from $2,600 – $7,000/year). I’m thinking that putting up some windmills and solar farms out there could significantly improve the lives of the people there.
I know people say, “Oh, what about the jobs lost? All those coal miners and oil field workers put out of work?” They’re right. It would be a significant change, and a lot of miners and oil field workers might have to find new jobs. But that has always been the case with progress (when was the last time you needed a farrier?).
Anyway, I could go on and on, but I’ll spare you.
What They Seem To Think American Exceptionalism Means
What “They” (and by “they”, I mean pretty much every candidate running for office, republican or democrat) seem to think American Exceptionalism means is this: A handy catchphrase that I can throw out there to make all those people that I wouldn’t give the time of day to if I weren’t running for office feel good about themselves and think I’m the guy who has their best interests at heart.
What Everyone Else Seems To Think American Exceptionalism Means
What I’ve gathered from talking to people (and reading their posts on social media) on all sides of the political/religious/economic fences seem to think it means is this: Americans are exceptional, EXCEPT for everyone who isn’t just like me. We are incredibly good (exeptionally good, you might say) at vilifying and demonizing everyone who doesn’t immediately and wholly agree with us. We are exceptionally good at being offended by anything that presents us with a differing opinion, while at the same time being exceptionally amazed that anyone could possibly be offended by anything we ourselves say or do. This is how we manage to be offended by rainbow flags (which are at least ostensibly about freedom, even if it’s just the freedom to be yourself), and yet insist on our right as Americans to fly a Rebel Flag (a flag designed and flown in support of rebellion against the nation and white supremacy).
I take comfort in the fact that, despite what views they seem to subscribe to, their actions belie their words. Virtually all of the people who say and post the things that I am pretty much completely opposed to are, despite their different opinions, good-hearted, decent, generous, and kind people, who would go out of their way to help a stranger in need, regardless of that stranger’s any race, creed, color, sexual orientation, or position on any of the issues that politicians use to divide us.
What I Think American Exceptionalism Means
I would say that the previous two sentences pretty much sums up what I think it means, except for the fact that I’ve seen people all over the world, Christians, Jews, Muslims, Atheists, Gays, Straights, Conservatives, Liberals, and people of pretty much every type imagineable do exactly the same thing. What it really comes down to, for me anyway, is this: Thanks to being American, and the freedoms we all too often take for granted, we have more opportunities to BE exceptional. We are born with the chance to do really exceptional things. We have the opportunity to be exceptionally kind, exceptionally generous, exceptionally loving and caring. We have the opportunity to live up to, and to help others achieve, the American ideals of Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness for all, not just those like “me”.
That, I think, would be truly exceptional.
