Prologue

None of this needs to be said – it’s just fun to say it! Proceed at your own risk, and don’t say I didn’t warn you.

And now, on with the show!

I’ve been noticing that there are a lot of folks out there who suffer from the delusion that what they have to say NEEDS to be said. I first noticed this in the title of John Pavlovitz’s blog, stuff that needs to be said. While I found myself agreeing with Pavlovitz quite a bit (at least in general), that whole “needs to be said” thing seemed a little over-the-top, pushy, overconfident, pompous, or even – dare I say it – arrogant. I do approve of the lack of capital letters in the title though: it shows at least a degree of humility.

Another notable example is Frank Schaeffer, a former Christian fundamentalist and current “self-described Christian atheist” who has a blog/substack entitled It Has to Be Said. Once again, I found myself agreeing with a lot of what Schaeffer had to say, but once again (again), I found myself thinking that “It Has to Be Said” was kind of overselling it.

Don’t get me wrong, I have no doubt that these are smart guys (probably much smarter then me) and a lot of thought goes into what they have to say (waaaaay more, for example, than has gone into any of my own posts), but I wonder – does all this REALLY need to be said? I know that essentially nothing I have to say NEEDS to be said (if you don’t believe me, just ask the lovely and talented Jess), and in fact, the world would probably be a better, more pleasant place if I didn’t say most of the stuff I do say (ask anyone in my family).

Even the minimal amount of research I put into this turkey of a post (and honestly, “minimal” might be overstating it) fetched up a whole raft of books, videos, and websites full of things that people feel have to be said, and said by them. And I think that’s the key right there – saying it has to be said is the same as saying it has to be heard. Otherwise, it’s just screaming into the abyss. From what I can see by a quick scan of Google results, pretty much nobody with something that “has to be said” has anything that actually has to be said.

Once again, I fall back on that old “words have meaning” pet peeve of mine. I am under no illusions that anything I say “has to be said”, nor does it have to be heard. However, I will admit to feeling that frequently there are some things that I need to say, whether anyone hears them or not. Screaming into the abyss may not do anyone else any good, but it often really makes the screamer feel better.

I mean, when was the last time you read any kind of “has to be said” thing that changed your mind about anything, or really even made you think? If anything, in these days of customized information streams (“Let our algorithm choose what info is best for YOU!”), the chances are that if we actually come across anything that contradicts what we already think/believe, we’re just going to ignore it. If we think about it at all, it’s just as a marginal reassurance that our impending robot overlords have some glitches in their software that we can exploit when they take over.

Of course, sometimes you just get lucky and actually say something that didn’t need to be said that someone did need to hear.

I guess what really bothers me about this whole thing is the sense of self-importance that these writers/bloggers/content creators have. I know I would never dream of saying that anything I had to say “has to be said”. I know better and, if I’m being honest, humility has always been one of my most outstanding qualities.

On second thought, I guess sometimes I do have to say the things I do – I’m just sure that no one actually needs to hear any of it.

Except you. You know who you are.